This Momentary Marriage...

When I was newly engaged and then newly married, I read half a dozen books on marriage. Now that I am 12 years into marriage, I assumed I had a good handle on this marriage thing. Hmmm…

Recently, a single friend of mine gave me a book called This Momentary Marriage by John Piper. Odd title, I thought. When I read the book, I realized that I still have much to learn about marriage. This book is not a “how to have a happy marriage” guide but rather, how to be married as God intended. What is the difference? The priority in marriage is on demonstrating Christ’s permanent love for His church TO the church and TO the world. Piper writes, “I pray that we will all recognize the deepest and highest meaning of marriage---not sexual intimacy, as good as that is, not friendship, or mutual helpfulness, or childbearing, or child-rearing, but flesh-and-blood display in the world of the covenant-keeping love between Christ and his church” (175). The focus is not on our happiness, but the glory of Christ. Marriage is a “parable of permanence”---that is, a temporary illustration (“until death do us part”) of the real, lasting union between Christ and His church. In glory, there will be no marriage, no husbands and wives, only THE Husband and His wife, the church.

John Piper has a tendency to turn my thinking upside down on just about every topic he writes or speaks about. Piper has been married 40 years, and yet the heart of his marital wisdom is not from his experience with his wife Noël, but rather, the truth of the gospel. So, Piper focuses my attention---rightly---on Christ. My marriage is not for my benefit, but for God’s purpose. Granted, marriage IS beneficial to husbands and wives, children and society. But, that is not why we get married and stay married.

This is a book written to the church, not to married couples. So, this is a book newlyweds and seasoned marrieds should read. This is a book that singles should read. This is a book that widows and widowers should read. This is a book that divorced people should read. This is a book that parents, grandparents and non-parents should read.

The church has much to learn on this subject, especially in a day and age where four out of ten marriages end in divorce and many weddings have become a self-indulgent and hyped-up prom. Reviewer Wayne Grudem writes, “I have taught about marriage for over thirty years, and I still found much that I could learn.” This is one of the best books on marriage I have ever read.

Piper, John. This Momentary Marriage: A Parable of Permanence. Crossway: Wheaton, 2009.

Canoeing in Killarney

I have heard Killarney Provincial Park described as the jewel of Ontario's parks. Now that my son and I had a chance to visit Killarney last week, I have to agree. I was impressed by the rugged, natural-beauty of the the park. The first lake we canoed was Bell Lake; it was calm, glass-like and gorgeous. The portages were deserted and our campsite on Johnnie Lake felt remote and tranquil. We had a gorgeous little beach at the mouth of out site and we had a wonderful view of the setting sun.

We did not see any wild life, which gave me the authentic sense that we were truly in the wilderness. Bill Mason, the legendary Canadian outdoorsman, always said that seeing wild animals in the wild is actually very rare. He ought to know.

It was wonderful to be out with my oldest son, exploring new territory and discovering for ourselves the "jewel of Ontario Parks!"

Papa and Nate Go Canoeing

Nate leading the canoe over shallow waters.

Almost a decade ago, I attended a seminar presentation on planning a father-and-son canoe trip. Led by my friend Mike and his son Ben, they gave testimonies of their experiences while canoeing together in the Canadian wilderness. I have never forgotten the impact "canoe tripping with dad" can have on a son (or daughter). So, when my oldest son turned 8, we had our first trip. It was a truly unforgettable experience. We have since been on one other trip and we are planning our third to Killarney this summer. Now that my second son, Nate, has turned 8, his turn has also come. We went to Algonquin Park this week for our first father-and-son canoe trip. We have been camping together since he was five, but this was his first wilderness expedition with me. We canoed 12 km into the interior of Algonquin Park. We camped on a small island overlooking a cove filled with loons, wood ducks and a blue heron. Despite some rain, we had a marvellous time. We also saw three moose during our trip, two of which swam to our island in the wee hours of the morning.

A moose just a stone's throw from our tent.

In addition to discovering (firsthand!) the beautiful wonders of God's creation, the greatest blessing is the opportunity to spend a lot of time with my son. I hope to learn more about who my son is, and who he is becoming. I also pray that he will witness authentic Christianity by spending every waking (and sleeping) moment with me.

So much wilderness, so little time.

Scout and Jem Go Camping

I just returned from my first "father-daughter" camping trip with my 5 year old Katie. We camped at Rock Point Provincial Park. It rained nearly the entire time, the tent was leaky, and the site was covered with muck, water, and mucky water.

While trapped in our tent on the first day, my sweat-pea said, "I really like camping with Papa."

After the first wet night, I was ready to pack it in and go to McDonald's for breaky. She persevered in persuading me to stick it out; so, I cooked on the Coleman under an umbrella and we ate breakfast sheltered by the back-hatch of the van.

She even wanted to stay another day.

Best part of camping? Scout replies, "Being allowed to run through puddles." We had plenty of puddles to spare this trip.

It's a girl!

I am happy to announce that the Lord blessed our family with a beautiful baby; she arrived safe and sound on July 17th, 2008. Her name is Abigail Adriaana.

Her brothers, Joseph and Nathanael, and her sister, Katherine, are very happy with the new addition. We thank God for His goodness and blessings to our family!

Katie with her new sister, Abby (less than a day old).

What's in a name?

She is named Abigail after the "intelligent and beautiful" woman in 1 Samuel 25:3, whose prudence calmed David's anger and kept him from sinning. David said to Abigail, "Blessed be the LORD God of Israel, who sent you this day to meet me, and blessed be your discernment, and blessed be you, who have kept me this day from bloodshed and from avenging myself by my own hand." (1 Sam 25:32-33). Abby's second name is given in honour of my Opa (her great grandfather), whose middle name was Adriaanus. Opa passed away in May of this year before Abby was born.

Children are a gift of God

"Behold, children are a gift of the LORD, The fruit of the womb is a reward. Like arrows in the hand of a warrior, So are the children of one's youth. How blessed is the man whose quiver is full of them."
Psalm 127:3-5

Fearfully and Wonderfully Made

"For You formed my inward parts; You wove me in my mother's womb. I will give thanks to You, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Wonderful are Your works, And my soul knows it very well. My frame was not hidden from You, When I was made in secret, And skillfully wrought in the depths of the earth; Your eyes have seen my unformed substance; And in Your book were all written The days that were ordained for me, When as yet there was not one of them."
Psalm 139:13-16

My Opa...

Hilbertus Albertus Adriaanus Vanderklok
February 24, 1923 - May 19th, 2008

A couple weeks ago, my Opa went home to be with the Lord. I was honoured with the opportunity to give the eulogy at his memorial service. As I prepared the eulogy, I discovered how difficult a task it is to publicly honour a loved one who has died. Was I speaking on behalf of myself… what Opa meant to me? Was I speaking on behalf of his children, grandchildren, friends? I was painfully aware of the mourning of others as well as myself.

In the end, I spoke about what my Opa meant to me. I wanted to speak the truth; what I knew to be true is what he meant to me personally.

He was, above all, a spiritual mentor to me. This was the most challenging aspect of the eulogy. I have many relatives who do not know the Lord. Initially, I confess that I was afraid of offending them with "religious" talk. I almost scrapped my whole eulogy the night before the service. Oh, what a foolish thing to fear! Ironically, my Opa was not squeamish about sharing his faith in Jesus Christ. In the end, I knew that I had to honour Christ if I were to truly honour my grandfather. By the grace of God, I shared his life of faith and what that faith meant to me. Here are two areas of my Opa’s Christian walk that meant a great deal to me.

He was a man of prayer. He prayed daily for his children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren. Daily. My Opa would not go to medical appointments before 9 o’clock in the morning because he was “still meeting with the Lord.” He got out of bed at 5 o’clock in the morning every day and he spent over three hours in prayer. When my father was clearing out Opa’s desk, he was amazed at the lists of people and organizations my Opa was praying for before his death.

My Opa also loved the Word. He read the Bible cover to cover hundreds of times since his conversion in 1963. At the plant where my Opa worked, he would spend every lunch break reading his Bible. On the tool box, by the machine he operated, sat his Bible. He was not ashamed of the gospel of Jesus Christ. His testimony at work resulted in the conversion of at least one of his co-workers, a man who has also become spiritual mentor to me, a man who is eternally grateful for my grandfather’s bold devotion to the Word of God.

What a legacy! What a gift my Opa was to my soul! By his example, he taught me to pray, to love the Word and to live my faith “always” and “everywhere.”

Before he died, my Opa filled out a form indicating his preferences regarding his funeral arrangements. In addition to which hymns he wanted sung and which Scripture passages he wanted read, my Opa was asked, “What message would you like to give to those left behind?” His response was this (paraphrased): “I hope to see everyone again someday, joining me kneeling at the throne of Jesus.” When the dead speak, the living listen.

Oh, that I would leave such a legacy for my children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren. Oh that I would be so bold in my Christian walk, to pray so fervently and to drink in the Word so faithfully. May my life and my death exult Christ as did my grandfather’s life and death!

At the Kilns: a grief experienced

Tonight, my Opa went home to be with his Lord and Saviour.

"Therefore, being always of good courage, and knowing that while we are at home in the body we are absent from the Lord---for we walk by faith, not by sight---we are of good courage, I say, and prefer rather to be absent from the body and to be at home with the Lord." (2 Co 5:6-8)

My heart lept for joy.

My Marriage and Tea

Over the past few months, my wife and I have been enjoying "tea time" in our living room; it is a time where we can sit together, enjoy a pot of tea (tea always tastes better when steeped in a pot as opposed to a mug), nibble on a little sweet treat and talk... no kids, no chores, no work. In the old days, we used to call it "couch time" (from the Growing Kids God's Way parenting course). It is amazing how easy it is to forget to spend time together on a regular basis with no interruptions and no distractions. Although tea may not be good for the teeth, it is good for my marriage.

Anyway, I came across this article on the "Abondante Living" web page, which gives the scoop on tea drinking traditions.

Canoeing Algonquin, again...

My son and I returned "up north" this summer to canoe the wilderness of Algonquin Provincial Park. This was our second canoe trip. Besides enjoying nature, seeing a beaver (!) and canoeing peaceful lake waters, I had a chance to be with my son. As he gets older (9 yrs!), I feel that my time to connect with him is rapidly fleeting. He is nearly a decade old and the years have flown by. In ten more years he may be moving out of the house, going to college or university, getting married, having babies...

Three days we were together, alone, camping and canoeing, breaking bread together, swimming, talking, reading. My prayer is that he will cherish these times. I know I will.

Study the Past...

"Most of all, perhaps, we need intimate knowledge of the past... A man who has lived in many places is not likely to be deceived by the local errors of his native village; the scholar has lived in many times and is therefore in some degree immune from the great cataract of nonsense that pours from the press and the microphone of his own age."--C.S. Lewis, "Learning in War-Time"

Above: Katie looking at the Lincoln Memorial. When one thinks of the struggle for freedom from slavery during the Civil War and freedom from discrimination during the Civil Rights movement, it is hard not to think of the fight against prejudice throughout the world, even today.

This summer, I took my family to Washington DC. What was remarkable was the rich history-laden symbolism that filled the capital of the United States. The founders of that great nation to the south not only celebrated their own history, but they borrowed from the history of humanity. The architecture incorporated aspects of many great human civilizations from the history of the world. These founding fathers knew their history and as a result established one of the greatest nations in the world.

Above: the boys posing outside the National Archives (which houses the Declaration of Independence and the Constitution, among other things). The plaque states, "Study the Past."

Learning about the past is often deemed irrelevant. Why learn about the past when we have current issues to address. Owen Barfield, a friend of C.S. Lewis called this "chronological snobbery"... that the present is better than the past. When teaching history, I refer to it as "contemporary bias". When studying history, what we often discover is that the modern issues are no different than the historical issues. We also discover that the big issues we face today are sometimes small when viewed from the perspective of history.

C.S. Lewis writes,

“To study the past does indeed liberate us from the present, from the idols of our own market-place. But I think it liberates us from the past too. I think no class of men are less enslaved to the past than historians. The unhistorical are usually, without knowing it, enslaved to a fairly recent past.”

As Christians, we should be especially learning from Christian history and Christian biography. I just recently finished reading the biography of the 19th-Century American missionary Adoniram Judson. He was a real Christian, who faced countless trials and yet persevered in the Lord. I was convicted, encouraged and invigorated by his life and testimony. John Piper writes, "[Good biography] is also theology---the most powerful kind---because it burst forth from the lives of people like us. It is also adventure and suspense, for which we have a natural hunger. It is psychology and personal experience, which deepens our understanding of human nature (especially ourselves)."

Too many Christians are enslaved to a fairly recent past; I wonder how many church-goers would be offended if their church exchanged the drum kit for a pipe organ. Too many Christians lament about "easier times" in by-gone days. When I read about the society of Christian America and the churches in Judson's day (early 1800s), I couldn't help but see the same troubles and opposition we encounter today.

So Christian, study the past. Let us not be short sighted. Read about the saints. Be liberated.

A Tribute to my Dad

I was inspired after reading Dr. Haykin’s blog tribute to his father. In this day and age, there are many people who harbour bitterness towards their fathers. Some hate their father. When friends and colleagues share their sorrow and pain as a result of their experiences with their fathers, I am in shock. My experience with my father is antithetical to these experiences. My father is one of my greatest role models for godliness and manhood. My sorrow is that I fall short of his example in so many ways. Below I have listed ten things I have learned from my father…

1. Be patient. My father is a man of infinite patience; when I was a boy working with him on a project around the house, he seemed to be more interested in me learning how to do something than the job actually getting done. No matter how many bent nails, sloppy paint jobs or badly cut wood, he patiently nudged me along to do a better job next time. I am convinced I became a teacher because he taught me patience. Both my brother and sister are also teachers.

2. Do what is right: the means justify the end. My father was interested in doing things the right way, not just get the job done. Doing what is good is better than getting good results by whatever means. What a lesson!

3. Love wisdom. My father is a wise man; O to be wise like him!

4. Never be hasty. Me thinks my father is a distant relative of Treebeard from Lord of the Rings. He would never commit to a decision over the phone. If the answer is needed right away, the answer would be “no.” He took time to decide anything, and many bad decisions were avoided and good decisions were made as a result.

5. Be honest, be sincere. In my recollection, my father has never lied nor broken a promise made.

6. Treat everyone with respect, no matter the age, no matter the education, no matter the economic status, whatever.

7. Be fair.

8. Love God. My father’s relationship with God is a private and personal one. It is also a supremely important one, the source of his strength and his goodness.

9. Love and serve the church. My father has worked tirelessly to serve the body of Christ. He still serves tirelessly.

10. Persevere.

To be such a man, may God give me the grace.

The Marriage Bed and Olives

This post is about sex, but nothing risqué… not that olives are really sexy or anything… unless you’re a vegetarian maybe… Anyway, before Christmas, I taught Homer’s The Odyssey to my Grade 12 Classical Civilization students. What startled my students was the supreme importance Homer places on family. As mentioned earlier in my posts on Family, this view is counter-culture. At the heart of the family is the marriage bed (that’s where babies are made…) As a result, the major symbol in the epic poem is the marriage bed. Getting into bed with his wife marks the end of Odysseus’s “odyssey”---his return journey. My students were used to “sex” being described in every way but within marriage. Marital sex is the supreme goal of Odysseus’s adventures. Let me give you the scoop on ancient Greece’s take on love and marriage…

In the epic poem, Odysseus’s wife and son have been waiting for Odysseus’s return. In the meantime, a bunch of free-loading suitors are loafing around Odysseus’s home, trying to woo the lonely wife and murder the inexperienced son. The home is in chaos and disarray. The suitors are pigging out on Odysseus’s food and wine and treating Odysseus’s servants badly. They are also incessantly flirting with Odysseus’s wife.

When Odysseus returns home, he comes in disguise as a beggar. He is treated badly by the rude suitors who occupy his home, violating Zeus’s doctrine of hospitality. When Odysseus reveals himself as the returned husband, he slaughters everyone in a gloriously vindicating bloodbath. While the hall dripped with blood and bodies were stacked outside the palace, Odysseus makes his way to bed with his wife Penelope.

His marriage bed, which Penelope has kept undefiled, was built by Odysseus before he left on his voyage to Trojan War (cf. The Illiad---by the way, Odysseus is the guy who cooked up the Trojan Horse scheme).

Using a rooted olive tree as the “cornerstone” bed post, he built his bed around the tree. The significance of a “rooted” marriage bed cannot be ignored. Like marriage itself, the bed is permanent and unshakeable. Then he built his bridal chamber around his bed; then he built his palace and city around that. At the centre of the city, literally and symbolically, is the marriage bed. As racy as that sounds, it is the undefiled marriage bed that is the centre of the civilized world in Homer’s mythological masterpiece.

Marriage was Ancient Greece’s way of countering the Fall, returning to Eden.

On a side note, I personally think it would be great to have an olive tree as a bed post.

It's a Wonderful Life

On Friday I was offered the opportunity to teach Greek drama, Classical mythology and Roman poetry to students in Rome, Greece and Crete. This is a phenomenal opportunity from a career and personal interest perspective. The only catch… it is during the month of July and I would be leaving my family behind.

Recently I blogged about the importance of family. Now I have to choose between my intellectual stand on family and my actual “living out” of my belief. I really want to go… I have a passion for Classical literature and drama. I would be teaching Classical civilization in the greatest classroom imaginable... surrounded by the ancient ruins and artefacts of the Classical world.

I told the Chair of the History Department this morning that I cannot go.

I reasoned from the perspective that---irnonically---I would miss too much if I went to Europe. Some of my colleagues think I am crazy passing up an all-expense-paid trip to Europe, teaching students in the midst of three thousand years of history. I should take advantage of the moment---“carpe diem”---seize the day!

But here is what I would miss if I went: camping with my son at the Pinery; camping with my family at Rock Point; my son’s ninth birthday party; a week visiting my brother and family in North Carolina; a friend’s wedding; family day trips to the beach; family hikes in local conservation; a month reading with my children and waking up in the morning with my wife.

The Latin phrase, “carpe diem” means “seize the day”---make the most out of your time because time is fleeting. “Carpe” was originally a Roman agricultural term, meaning to “pluck” a crop during harvest. I feel I am seizing the day by not leaving my family. Now is the time to be with my daughter and sons and wife. Like a crop at harvest time, these hours and days with my family cannot be reclaimed. No farmer can put off harvest. When harvest time comes, the crop must be "plucked". Likewise, no man can put off the young years of his family. My sons and daughter will eventually grow up and leave home. Now is the time to be with my children, now is the time to visit my brother and my nieces and nephew.

My favourite movie when I was a boy was “It’s a Wonderful Life”. Remember George Bailey’s desire to travel and see the world? Remember how the seemingly mundane things of life held him back? He never made it to Rome or Paris, but he had a wonderful life. It is not just about “duty” to family and friends; it is about living a wonderful life.


The ruins can wait. My family cannot. The ruins will always be there. These precious moments with my children and my wife can never be reclaimed. Carpo diem. I am seizing the day. My life is a wonderful life.

The anthropological significance of breaking bread together

The human biological need to eat is not a result of the Fall in Eden. God created Adam and Eve in a “garden” with fruit-bearing trees and no doubt vegetable-bearing plants. Eating is no different from the other pre-Fall aspects of Creation---marriage, procreation, work, stewardship of terrestrial resources. Humans have a fundamental need, woven into their make-up, to eat. This fundamental need goes beyond the biological need to survive. There is an anthropological significance to “breaking bread”.

For the Christian, the concept of breaking bread is deeply rooted in biblical symbolism. From the manna in the wilderness, to the Last Supper, to the banquet feast in glory, “breaking bread” holds great significance.

In my previous post “Family and the Odyssey”, I commented on the decline of the “family dinner” in Western culture. When I ask my students how often they eat together as a family, I am surprised by the small number of students who have family dinners at all. Does it really matter? The answer is yes. Unfortunately, our forefathers have failed in passing along the reasons for many fundamental aspects of human culture. Our forefathers took it for granted that people would always value “breaking bread” together. Fifty years ago, the dinner table was the hub of the family home. Unfortunately, soccer games, overtime at the office and instant meals have contributed to the devalued role of dinner.

At my school, which has a long history rooted in the traditions of English independent schools, we have a common lunch period. All students and faculty “break bread” together. The students are divided into Tutorial groups (10-12 students) and they sit together with their teacher. We stand, waiting for the Head table to say grace and then we eat the food in “family-style” serving bowls. Food is “passed” between students; emptied bowls are refilled for the next student. I have heard faculty complain about eating with the students. At times, I complain myself. After teaching my students all morning, it can be overwhelming sitting with them at lunch as well. However, I am reminded of the significance of breaking bread together as a school.

Most schools are cafeteria style or buffet style. If you have ever been to a buffet, then you know how anti-social it is. Everyone is getting up and down walking to the buffet, vying for the last egg roll or chicken strip. You eat what you want, when you want and how much you want. There is no need to be civil other than waiting for your turn at the trough. The meal becomes an individual’s pursuit of personal satisfaction. At my school, we have a strong sense of community and I think this is partly a result of the fact we eat a common meal together.

Eating reminds us of our connection to other humans in our community. We have this in common with each other---we need to eat. Eating food together is also a reminder of our civilization: there are manners and signs of respect that are reinforced on a daily basis. Things like passing the plate to someone. Saying “please” and “thank-you”. Eating in moderation to save food for the next person. Refilling an empty serving bowl.

Humans are forgetful and as a result of the Fall, sinful and selfish. Eating together is a daily reminder of our pre-Fall existence. Harmony, civility and camaraderie define shared meals. These values are reinforced when we “break bread” together, as a school and as a family.

Family and The Odyssey

Yesterday, I was chatting with a friend about the importance of family. From the outset of creation, God established the family. He made Adam and Eve to be the first marriage and He commanded them to procreate (i.e., make a bigger family). God's relationship with us is described in family terms--we are His sons and daughters; Christ is our brother.

When I was reflecting on the biblical view on family, I couldn't help but think how counter-culture this view has become in the West. North Americans and Western Europeans are not having babies, they are marrying much later in life, more are not marrying at all. In a recent study by the Canadian Department of Human Resources and Social Development, Canadians are spending less time with their families and more time on their own. Eating as a family is becoming a novelty reserved for Thanksgiving and Christmas dinners. Children are being raised by daycare workers and public schools. Spouses pursue divergent careers, hobbies and holidays. The term Family seems to hold only legal and biological significance.

Some would say, who cares? Leave It to Beaver went off the air long ago. Is family important? Ironically, the two founding worldviews of the Western world---classical and Christian---celebrate family as the building blocks of civilization. I have already mentioned briefly the fundamental import of family from Genesis. Similar value is reflected in the "bible" of Classical Greece, The Odyssey.

The term "odyssey" has come to mean, in a colloquial sense, a quest or journey in which one engages on life altering adventures. However, the Odyssey is really a story about a hero's return home--his "nostos". The hero, Odysseus, shuns pleasures of goddesses and wealth, in order to return to his family. He must be a father to his son and a husband to his wife. His journey does not end until Odysseus has returned to his marriage bed. In the epic, Odysseus's return home to his island kingdom of Ithaca restores order and civilization. Odysseus is an absentee father who realizes the importance of family to a meaningful life and a civilized society. If this sounds too much like a Hallmark card synopsis, you need to read the epic poem yourself. Odysseus's return is not a "touchy feely dead-beat-dad redemption story"--it is a profoundly human proclamation of the monumental significance of family to human existence. This concept of "family" became the quintessential social underpinning for the Greek world.

Western civilization needs to return home; we need our odyssey, our nostos.

Canoeing Algonquin

Last week, my 8-year-old son and I went on a three-day canoe excursion into the wilderness of Algonquin Park. We had a glorious time in God's Creation as well as celebrating my son's road to manhood. It was a challenge for him and he had responsibilities. I pondered how few responsibilites and challenges children have today, even my own son. It is no wonder so few grow up to be men who are willing to be faithful and responsible to their families and boldly face challenges. We live in an urban area, where water comes from the tap, food comes from the grocery store, fire comes from the stove and we drive to get where we need to go. In such a time as ours, it behooves us as fathers to create situations where life isn't so convenient. Even so, our little canoeing trip pales in comparison to the life of early pioneers. A few years ago, I read to my son a number of the Little House on the Prairie books by Laura Ingalls. I was painfully reminded how little I know about "work". If Pa Ingalls had been lazy or even mediocre in his work habits, then the Ingalls would have surely died on the American Frontier. There was also a greater dependency on God as Provider. The Ingalls lived off of the land; as God provided for them, so they had. From the books, I was also reminded how good and right it is for man to work. In Eden, God called man to work the garden. Paradise wasn't a wilderness; it was a garden that needed to be tilled, sown and reaped.

It is my prayer and active concern to point my sons towards the goal of manhood and encourage them in the calling God places upon them as men... men who know how to work, men who take hold of their responsibilities and men who are bold in the face of adversity... in other words, men who are like Christ.